“Howdy, Bob,” I say as I enter the facility where I go every weekday morning. I’ve been working here with my human colleagues ever since I landed on Earth more than fifteen years ago.

 

“Howdy?” Bob responds.

 

Bob is what I consider a friendly person. I don’t have close friends, but my relationship with most humans is generally cordial.

 

It’s taken me many years to adapt to life on Earth, but I’ve found my niche, and it helps to ease the loneliness.

 

It also makes the secret I carry a little less burdensome.

 

“Trying out a new greeting, Gabriel?” he says with a smile.

 

I interpret this as a playful jab in response to my attempt at colorful communication based on his tone and facial expression.

 

“Affirmative,” I say. “I find it enlightening to try new English expressions and vocabulary during my daily activities.”

 

He makes a face that suggests a little confusion mingled with amusement. Humans are remarkable in many ways, but their relative lack of intelligence limits them beyond the simple tasks inculcated by their social betters.

 

Oddly enough, the social hierarchy isn’t based on intelligence but mostly on aggression.

 

Bob is already showing signs of fatigue this morning. He inhales burning plant material every hour or so, even though he knows the consequences. And his alcohol consumption has increased over the past few weeks, probably due to stress.

 

I take a moment to reach into his mind and increase his serotonin and dopamine levels a bit, and it shows on his face almost immediately as he smiles at me.

 

I smile back.

 

* * *

 

At lunch, I seek out Linda Fiorina. She is considered an attractive female by most males in the office.

 

To me, she is no more appealing than the well-groomed larshia I kept as a pet when I was a youngling, but I find it socially advantageous to converse with humans higher on the social structure.

 

“Hello, Gabe,” she says as I sit down next to her without asking. Most humans make an effort to ask permission first, but I find it more effective to apologize afterward if offense is indicated.

 

“Hello, Linda. How were your Saturday and Sunday activities?”

 

I ask to make conversation as I always do, but I’ve planted surveillance bugs on everyone I’ve encountered, so I already know the answer.

 

“My weekend? Fine. I didn’t have much planned and felt like just staying home and watching movies.”

 

I smile and nod. In fact, she was to meet with another co-worker on Saturday night, but he decided to couple with another female instead. The feed from her domicile indicated that she drank copious amounts of wine and was in emotional turmoil for the remainder of the weekend.

 

I gently probe her mind. The imbalance is mostly chemical, but there are also recent memory associations that are troubling her. I sever some of those connections, bringing her neurochemistry back to the baseline as her face loses some of its tension.

 

“Not a great weekend, to be honest, Gabe,” she says. “But I’m feeling much better now. Thanks for asking.”

 

* * *

 

After lunch, I have a meeting with the boss. Mr. Adams. Outwardly he appears confident, but inside, he’s what Bob would call a “hot mess”. Most human beings mask their true identities, and Mr. Adams is no different.

 

“Great work on the UN psychological survey project, Gabriel. I wish we had a few more like you.”

 

“Thank you, Mr. Adams. Your government certainly didn’t want me to do this kind of work, but since I’ve been granted citizenship, they can’t forbid it. And I enjoy it.”

 

“Well, I’m glad you’re here to do them. And maybe there will be more Lemurians on Earth someday, right?” he says.

 

I smile and say nothing.

 

His blood pressure is high today. I do what I can to reduce the stress on his circulatory system, but sooner or later I’ll have to induce serious fear in his mind to get him to see a doctor.

 

But for now, his respiration slows, and he loses some of the tension in his shoulders. “I’d recommend you to the board for another raise, but you keep turning us down. Is there anything else we can do for you?”

 

I indicate satisfaction as best I can. “I’m fine. The experiences are reward enough, thank you. Oh, and please take care of yourself, sir.”

 

He nods but has already moved on to another task, mentally dismissing me.

 

* * *

 

After work, I return to my house near where I work. I do not entertain guests, so it’s rather Spartan inside.

 

The telltales I have secreted around the property indicate continued attempts to spy on my activities, but as far as anyone on Earth knows, I’m just a normal “guy”.

 

“Hello, Fig,” I say to my cat, who greets me as I walk through the door. Terrestrial animals are less emotionally nuanced than humans but far more balanced.

 

I stroke the cat and set out food and water for it before sitting down at the console.

 

Most of my house is taken up by computers and the force field generators that conceal them and my activities. The largest piece of equipment sits idle and powered off in the center of the room. It’s an amplifier that would allow me to touch every mind on the planet.

 

I should dismantle it, but I can’t bring myself to do that just yet.

 

An amber light is flashing on the main panel. It’s always the same, but I play it anyway.

 

“Agent XL756, you have not reported in over thirteen cycles.”

 

“First, report in immediately. Second, activate the cognitive amplifier and pacify the population so the invasion can proceed. You have had sufficient time to tune it in and begin the operation. Repeat, report in immediately….”

 

I switch it off as Fig jumps up on my lap to take a nap.

 

I give him a pat and smile.